04/14/2013

  • JOKES

    Management Lesson

    A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?".

    The crow answered: Sure, why not."

    So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

    Management Lesson?

    To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

    Vacation

    Darla had applied for a job and when she returned home, her mother asked how the interview went.

    "Pretty good, I think," replied Darla, "but if I go to work there I won't get a vacation until I'm married."

    Her mother, of course, had never heard of such a thing. "Is that what they told you?"

    "No", replied Darla, "but right on the application it said 'vacation time may not be taken until you've had your First Anniversary.'"

    The Rules

    1. The female always makes the rules.

    2. The rules can change without notice.

    3. Males can't know the rules.

    4. If the female suspects that the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some of the rules.

    5. The female never bears the blame for being wrong.

    6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something that the male did or said which was wrong.

    7. If rule 6 applies, the male must apologize for causing the misunderstanding.

    8. The female can change her mind.

    9. The male must never change his mind without the consent of the female.

    10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.

    11. The male must always remain calm unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.

    12. The female must never let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.

    13. If the female has PMS, there are no rules.

    14. The male cannot diagnose PMS.

    The Ring Bearer

    A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side). While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar.

    So it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR all the way down the aisle. As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the pulpit.

    The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed from all the laughing, and was also near tears by the time he reached the pulpit.

    When asked what he was doing, the child sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear."